Grief is the most painful of all human experiences and can bring about stronger emotions then perhaps you have ever felt. It is the process which allows people to grieve and come to terms with the loss and resulting change in their lives. Grief is a very personal and individual experience and is comprised not of just one feeling, dosage but of many. However, though we may experience different feelings at different times, grief usually follows a general, recognisable pattern. After a loss such as bereavement, the initial response is one of numbness and disbelief.
Different people react in different ways and even if death occurred after a long ailment. You may feel cold, numb, empty and the situation unreal for a time. You may experience anger, panic, guilt and sadness. This may also be accompanied by periods of restlessness, especially at night when it is difficult to sleep. You may react by becoming irritable or critical of yourself and others, which can lead to feelings of despair.
All these are natural reactions to bereavement and it should not be assumed that you cannot cope any more.
During this time you will need the support of others. Don’t be afraid to speak to someone about your feelings as this may help you to feel less isolated in your sadness. It is good advice not to take any major decisions during this period. Often people jump into decisions such as moving house or area at a time when they are particularly vulnerable and emotional. A home which holds many memories may seem painful initially but such associations could be seen as comforting later on.
This is a difficult time for family and friends who may be afraid to speak about your loved one for fear of upsetting you. It may be necessary for you to take the first step: let others know that you want to talk seek their support.
Grief is an individual processes so don’t think that you should necessarily experience feelings exactly as described by anyone else. What is important is you allow yourself time to grieve and come to terms with your loss in the way taught to us by the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)
Muslims believe in the inevitability of death of the human body and not the end of the spirit but the beginning of the life hereafter, which is everlasting. Death must therefore be accepted and dealt with in a dignified manner and according to the rulings of the Islamic Shariah.